Journey to be a Bride and Beyond
As a small girl of your Mom and Dad (being a gift to you them), one must not have thought about the achieving the milestones like, marriages, love, motherhood, etc. If we see from a girl’s perspective, we see that world is nothing without us, which is true but it is true otherwise also that the world is nothing without males too. LOL… lets give the credit to male gender also and let us just look at ourselves as humans without being biased towards either of the genders. This is very important aspect for any girl to learn before getting married because it is very obvious for all the girls to have that perception that only we do work the whole day and males don’t which is true as we do double duty but Husbands will never accept this. So for a happy life, pull it out of your mind that Women does double duty. In this article we will be learning the important aspects of a journey of a girl who is going to be a bride soon.
When we are small we always get all the love and respect from family and especially from our parents which ultimately helps in building our confidence. We grow up with their love and blessings. While growing up we make so many friends and we just have a blast with them. This is one stage of life. Then comes love and the relationship phase where we just have to take a chance and rely on the fate and faith in ourselves and a belief that all will go well in life along with preparing ourselves for the worst (sorry for being so upfront).
Then comes marriage, whether Love or Arranged, it is very beautiful part of any girl’s life. Certain aspects of our marriages are very important to be handled properly and for the bride to be, it becomes more significant because they face a lot of challenges since the day she gets engaged. She will have to learn new people, new behavior, new city (if not marrying in the same city), new person, and finding ways to get settled in the new system. It’s almost like taking a new birth.
Challenges faced by the “To be Bride:
- The Difference in Religion and Culture: The biggest challenge for any girl is learning the rituals and rules of the new family. For example, for you and your family holy could be big gala time, but for your husbands family it may just finish it with a small Pooja.
- Learning new recipes and changing the eating habits: Whether you marry in the same cast or in a different caste, the food and eating habits are going to be different. So, clear your mind of all the food and taste and be ready to develop new taste for new food all together.
- Managing with the different mindsets of two different families: A girl marries a family and not a person and so one needs to understand if two different people have different thoughts and opinions then how big the difference will be between the two families. A very simple trick to handle the situation is be safe and be smart and speak only when you feel right from inside.
- Adapting to different lifestyles: A girl’s may have a very open minded or very practical family and thoughts at her parents place. But her husbands family is very different in terms of being conservative or religious family. She has to be ready to adapt the same happily and without cribbing about it over to anyone (not even to husbands-it irritates them).
- Work life balance after marriage: it becomes very difficult for a girl who is career oriented to settle into a family who doesn’t give or give less importance to work than home. It is also otherwise, these days that the family is so career oriented, but the girl is not and wants to be a home artist. In both the situations the girls are a problem. Right? No problem at all. Just be yourself and be confident of doing what you are happy with and try to explain in laws and husbands about your likes and dislikes. One more thing, keep yourself busy and distracted from any negativity.
- Relationship management: Along with work life and home life, there are many other things which a girl needs to keep in mind. Relation with husband, in laws, other relatives are also very important to be managed. It is recommended to manage well in way by limiting it to your capacity and nothing extra doing for anyone by setting wrong expectations for anyone. Be you and so people will accept the way you are without showing extra of you and creating problems for yourself in future.
- Managing Work, Home, and Kids: The biggest challenge a woman shall face after marriage is planning for a kid and then growing them up. After having kids you will have to devote not less than full time of your five years to them. It is suggested that if you want to have kids then best is to plan it as early as possible because more than your career, your health is important and also you will be able to enjoy the time with your kid. And then start with your work again after you thing your kids are independent enough to handle himself, at least for four hours in a day. Yes, we all women need to sacrifice this time of our career to have the happiness of having kids. “Kuch pane ke liye kuch khona padta hai”.
We girls always feel that we compromise on so many things. But it suggested that instead of taking things are compromised, it is better to think all of these as you have been given a project in which you have to gain the best results possible and all those things you forego should be taken as opportunity cost. If we all think like this, then I think there will be less sorrow and more peace within us. All in all we would like to give a message to all of you that “PLEASE DO NOT FORGET TO KEEP YOURSELF HAPPY”. While we are in our work life also doing things (pursuing any hobby) for ourselves the we should also do the same after marriage and after kids also. Remember, IF I AM NOT HAPPY HOW CAN MY LOVED ONCE BE HAPPY? Beauti Art says Take Care and Love Yourself.